What I Wish I Said #imustconfess

After many years of corporate training programs, I now know that when it comes to learning and taking in information, I am a “reflector.” (based on the Honey & Mumford Learning Style Questionnaire).

I’m not good at responding straight away. I need time to take in information before providing a considered response.

What I Wish I Said - myhometruths.com

In my previous role, this was seen to be an advantage because accuracy was more important than speed. I was not pressured to have an answer to everything right away – it was expected that I would research and provide a measured response.

However, in the real world, it’s all about speed.

If you are in conversation with someone, you can’t really respond by saying “I’ll get back to you on that one” when confronted with a challenging issue. You are expected to share your opinion in order to keep the conversation flowing.

And if someone directly challenges you on something, it’s best to stand your ground and provide an immediate response, instead of asking for time to come up with an accurate and measured answer.

Being a reflector is not always the best way to be in a confrontational setting…

For years I’ve found comfort in the online world, where I can sit and mull and contemplate before commenting.

However, online life is speeding up as well.

Social media channels wait for no-one. For instance, it’s the quick and the dead on Twitter and many have learned to their cost that being slow and steady does not win the race there.

These days you are rewarded for fast, witty and timely responses.

In the blogging world, viral posts are the ones that seem to strike a chord on a topic that’s current right then and there. It’s rare for virality to follow the post that’s published a few weeks after the fact.

So for reflectors like me, the online world challenges our need for time and space when considering an issue, just as the real world does.

There have been many times over the years where I’ve lamented my reflector nature. Just once I’d love to be the one who has an awesome comeback for an ignorant remark right then and there.

Instead, this normally happens when I’m at home in bed, mulling over the events of the day.

It would be nice for my brain to take in things a little faster and allow me to respond in the moment.

Alas, I will never be the one with the fast or witty response. Instead, I’ll be the one who ends their day reflecting on what I wish I said and planning my next post, which will take me hours to write and research.

Because at least I’m good at research and contemplation. While I may not be fast, no-one can ever say I’m not comprehensive or accurate when it does come to my eventual response!

Have you experienced times when you wish you said something else? Are you a reflector like me?

Make your confession and join in with the fun and the real community we are building here at #imustconfess!

And don’t forget to join in with our #imustconfess community over on facebook. It’s where the confessing continues beyond the linkup. And the best part? You don’t even need to blog or be a blogger to take part!

Join the community!

To help you along with the confessing, here are the future prompts so you have no excuse not to take part each week!

I Must Confess...2016 Prompts - myhometruths.com

The Rules…

I Must Confess

– I Must Confess is a link up that runs every Monday and remains live for the whole week.

– You can link up something old or new, we’re not fussy around here.

– Feel free to go with the prompt for the week or add your own confession, whatever suits.

– Please go forth and share the comment love – it is bloggy crack after all!

– We’re always open to suggestions for the weekly prompt


Next weeks’ #imustconfess prompt is – my worst habit

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23 Responses

  1. Raych says:

    I don’t reflect enough which probably more often than not leads to foot in mouth disease. I still have moments where I’ve taken too long to respond or haven’t responded at all when I really should have. Not sure if I’m learning to pick my battles or slowing down in my old age.

  2. Tegan says:

    I like the online world because I can make a more measured response. That hasn’t always been the case though and it’s come from learning the hard way to always think before you type.
    Tegan recently posted..All the things I didn’t say…

  3. I wanna know what snappy response you came up with hours later! But you’re right, the online world is speeding up, too, which makes it feel completely different.

  4. Vanessa says:

    Oh I have no idea which of those I am. It’s like personality tests, I can see myself using each one in a different situation, and I can’t pick one to be dominant. I am the worlds biggest generalist.
    Vanessa recently posted..What I Wish I Really Said

  5. Oh I am so doing that test….because I know I have been ‘less than measured’ in some of my decisions over the years. This is another excellent prompt…what was I seeing in your response to me on “are you creative?” See…..I must confess….is another wonderful example. Cheers, Denyse xx

  6. Most people hate confrontation but how many times do you get into a disagreement with someone and after it is over, you wish you had of said something really smart or funny. I always do that.

  7. Yeah, I’m with you Kirsty – I think I’m a reflector too. I take time to process things and so often think of something clever I could have said – several hours later! Never been quick witted at all – I envy those who are! 🙂

  8. jess says:

    I do a bit of both. Sometimes I respond far too quickly and get myself into trouble, and other times I kick myself by thinking of the perfect reply hours too late.

  9. Michelle V says:

    I do both aswell. Sometimes I say the first thing that comes to mind, and other times I regret not saying what I felt I should have at the time.

  10. I havent’ done the test you mention, but I’m pretty sure I’m a reflector as well. I know that I need time to receive information and digest it before I can respond or make a decision. I think that’s why I love writing, blogging and public speaking so much – I can take my time to consider my response. Though like you’ve said, I’ll probably never have something go viral coz I take too long to respond!

  11. Tory says:

    I am notorious for coming up with excellent responses – eight hours after someone has said something!

  12. Kirsty
    Thanks so much for such a great prompt! There are so many things I would say or do differently if I had my time over though I am not sure it would have made a huge differently to where I am now
    kit@lifethroughthehaze recently posted..Things I wish …

  1. July 11, 2016

    […] I sit down to write this weeks prompt for I Must Confess, I kind of must confess that I can only think of negative things to write about. And that […]

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