Understanding My Boy

I’m so thankful and grateful this week for the many people who understand and accept my boy.

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I may be biased but he really is a special little boy.  He is funny and witty and clever and perceptive. He has an answer for everything and looks at the world in his own unique way. And he always makes me smile, even if that closely follows him making me completely mad…

Today he was regaling me with his usual tales of what had happened two years ago at his old school (we get a lot of delayed stories around here). He referred to something as “four-eyed” and I asked him whether anyone had ever called him that because he wore glasses. In his usual, matter of fact way, he told me that would be silly because only aliens have four eyes.

I had to smile at his logic. I then told him that I had been called “four eyes” at school because I wore glasses and that had made me sad. He then asked me why I hadn’t teased them back – the words did not have any affect on him so he could not understand why they would make me sad. I was all at once proud of him for his spirit and hopeful that maybe he won’t be broken by bullying.

To enjoy the full force of his personality you do have to get past his initial aversion to strangers which manifests in several ways. He often uses “potty words” to describe others and will not look you in the eye or stay still while you speak to him. Often it appears he is not paying any attention to you at all but then he will respond appropriately which can be off-putting.

Thank goodness we are not the only ones who can see past his quirks to appreciate the jewel of a personality underneath.

Gilbert’s teacher has really connected well with him this year. He is the first teacher that Gilbert has not openly loathed (which has got to be a positive!) and he is so calm with him. He recognises Gilbert’s strengths and works with them – like my son’s bent for creative writing which he is encouraging by getting him to write a weekly journal.

Gilbert’s teacher can also see past his quirks to recognise how hard he is trying to do his best. This week he awarded Gilbert with an award for organisation – for always being prepared and for following instructions/directions. I know for a fact that these are not Gilbert’s strengths so I am very proud that his efforts in these areas have been acknowledged.

His speech therapists also appreciate him, quirks and all. They helped him and two other boys put together a movie at their session this week and they were surprised by his passion for the project. He asked that the movie have out takes and credits and provided a lot of the ideas for the finished product. His therapists have told me it is one of the funniest things they have seen – I, for one, can’t wait for the premiere!

I was also pleased this week to find out that two of the parents who came along to Matilda’s birthday party on the weekend saw through Gilbert’s quirks and appreciated his very individual take on life.  One of the parents was amused by his use of the word “nincompoop” and his defence that it wasn’t a swear word as it has the word “poop” in it, while another just enjoyed sitting back and watching him do his thing.

For me, witnessing real acceptance and enjoyment of my boy and his amazing personality by others is wonderful to see. As a parent, all you want  is for your kids to be happy and to find their place in the world.

So, today, I am so happy and grateful and thankful that others are starting to understand my boy and appreciating his unique and amazing personality.

Linking up for the first time with We Heart Life for Thankful Thursday – what are you thankful for today?

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10 Responses

  1. Rhianna says:

    Kirsty this is just a beautiful post. How wonderful to have Gilbert so accepted. Friary wishes and butterfly kisses
    Rhianna recently posted..Thankful for an awesome hairdresser

    • Kirsty says:

      Thanks Rhianna – I finally found your comments in my spam folder – how rude of me! “Friary wishes” back to you too!!!!

  2. Becc says:

    Will your boy be the next big blogger or famous author?
    We all want the same for our children – albeit it is harder for others. I expect though that with people like you putting the word out there to gain acceptance, slowly but surely you will have an impact 🙂
    Becc recently posted..Christmas….got it sorted!

    • Kirsty says:

      Becc, he could be anything he wanted to be – I personally think he may be an indie film maker in the end!

      I’m hoping my posts and my advocacy for people with special needs will make some sort of difference to someone, somewhere. Here’s hoping anyway…

  3. Me says:

    What a lovely post. I am so glad to hear of other parents being accepting of Gilbert – that must have really made your day.
    A great insight into how differently some people see things i.e. for eyes = alien not someone wearing glasses.
    Have the best day !
    Me recently posted..Happy Birthday Mom !

    • Kirsty says:

      I was very pleasantly surprised to know that others could appreciate Gilbert the way we do – I’m so used to the stares and the explaining that it was amazing to just let him be him and be accepted. It was special and I hope it happens again!

  4. Your little boy has some of the same quirks as my boyfriend; I love it when I can be talking to him and he is doing something else [which I take as not paying attention] but then can tell me word for word what I just said. Hmm.

    I am a teacher and I love watching and listening to my children. I love each and every one of their quirks and I love that I can talk to their parents at length about their child and know that they know that I love their children with every bone in my body as though they were my own. I am glad that your boy has that too.

    Thank you for linking up x
    Carly ~ We Heart Life Creator recently posted..Thankful Thursday

    • Kirsty says:

      Carly, teachers are worth their weight in gold! I particularly appreciate those that do take the time to get to know their students and appreciate that they learn in their own way. It certainly makes me feel better as a parent to know that my kids are understood and appreciated for who they are. Thanks so much for hosting Thankful Thursday!

  5. Lauren/y says:

    As far as we know our little man isn’t on the spectrum, but he has had a few very difficult periods when I would pull my hair out at the way others could not see his wonderful points. Isn’t great when people come along who just get it?
    Lauren/y recently posted..My Week According to Instagram

    • Kirsty says:

      There’s nothing better than someone “getting” your child and seeing them for who they are. As I’ve said before, all you want for your kids is acceptance and understanding and when you get that, it makes your soul sing!

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