According to Gilbert
My son is possibly the most interesting person I know. Anyone who has the chance to get to know him agrees that he is one hell of a character. So I thought I would share some of his sayings with you today so you can get a taste of what he is all about.
1. According to Gilbert, it is all about pinkies (girls) vs blueys (boys) in this house. Apparently, he and his dad are an endangered species as they are outnumbered by us girls and have to stick together. It’s all about survival, you know.
2. According to Gilbert, slippery dips are not that exciting because all you do is climb up the ladder and then fall down – well, let’s face it, that’s the real truth, isn’t it?
3. According to Gilbert, he is determined to build a time machine so he can go back in time to be a baby again. Apparently babies have it made, they don’t have to go anywhere, they don’t have to go to school and they get to spend all day with their mums. For Gilbert, that represents his perfect life!
4. According to Gilbert, he wants to retire now. Why go through the motions of finishing school just to get a job you don’t want anyway? If he had his way, he’d be living in a caravan in a caravan park right now…possibly tinkering with his time machine…
5. According to Gilbert, healthy food is no good. Fruit and vegetables are not allowed near his plate or his mouth. Chips are NOT made from potato, okay?
6. According to Gilbert, Delilah can do no wrong while Matilda is the bane of his life. And, why does he have 2 sisters but no brother?
7. According to Gilbert, it is completely unfair that we don’t let him use the iPad or the computer or watch TV or DVDs all day, every day. While we’re at it, he thinks it’s totally unfair that we don’t let him have what he wants or let him do what he wants, all of the time. We’re clearly cruel parents who don’t really love him.
8. According to Gilbert, the instruments of the orchestra trump the instruments in a rock band every time. Just so you know, the pipe organ is the best instrument of all.
9. According to Gilbert, statues of Jesus all look like Hagrid from Harry Potter. Well, they both have beards, anyone can see the resemblance…
10. According to Gilbert, home is best. It’s nice to visit other places, very occasionally and only when he’s in the mood, but there’s nowhere like home.
Joining in with Jess for IBOT – I’d love to hear the thoughts of your kids too, I can’t get enough of their honest, logical and forthright views on our crazy world!
P.S. Gilbert personally reviewed this list before publishing for quality control purposes.
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